So the other day as Benn and I are talking about how excited we are for our new little girl to almost be here, I realized that I am also slightly terrified. I mean...in so many ways I still feel like a kid myself and realizing that in a less than 2 weeks I will officially be a mom just seems so surreal. I find myself worrying if I have enough clothes and if I got the right kind of bottles and just so many other weird random things. Then I realized that the worrying will never go away. I will worry about this girl for the rest of my life. Obviously the worries I have will change as she grows and new children come into our family, but the worries will always be there. And that...ladies and gentleman, is terrifying to me!
A day or so after having all of these realizations, Benn and I had interview with the Stake Presidency to renew our temple recommends. The man that did my interview couldn't help but notice my rather large belly (no surprise there!), so naturally we talked a little about the new baby. I mentioned some of the realizations that I had the previous day and he offered some wonderful council. As I left the Stake building, I felt such comfort and peace. I felt an over-whelming gratitude for a Heavenly Father that hears and understands my worries and fears. I realized how grateful I am for the ability and privilege to hold a recommend to the house of the Lord where I can go to find comfort and peace for all those fears and worries. I have the wonderful opportunity to spend time in that beautiful building and receive answers and guidance on so many different obstacles that I currently face and will face in the future. What a wonderful blessing in these terrifying times!
So while yes, I am terrified about this new chapter in our lives, I am also comforted. I'm comforted to know that I'm never alone. I have a wonderful husband, amazing family and friends, and a loving Heavenly Father who is aware of me. Who could ask for more?
You are so right! Your stewardship over this sweet spirit never really ends... so neither will the worrying. Not only is Heavenly Father aware of you, He is also aware of your daughter and her needs. You will be blessed as you learn to recognize and follow the inspiration He will give you concerning her care and upbringing. Some call it "mother's intuition", but I believe that we are blessed with inspiration for those over whom we have stewardship. Parenthood is similar to the mantle of a calling in the church. Except that parenthood is a life-long calling! An incredibly rewarding (and tiring at times) calling. Remember that faith will help you overcome your fears. You and Benn will be great parents!! The best advice we received was to keep in mind that you are the only parents and the only parenting your child will have and know at first. So if you mess up sometimes... they won't know any better! At least when they are little. :) We are keeping you in our prayers. Hang in there!! Sending lots of love your way...
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